Sweetie Neglect: What Helped Me To Remember My Son Is Precious

A few days ago, I was having a frustrating moment. It was naptime, and Mr. Sweetie had other plans, even though he was desperately tired. It felt like trying to catch an elephant in a fishing net, but, finally, we settled down, and I had a sudden thought: I need something to help remind me how important and precious Mr. Sweetie is in moments like this. And, before I thought any more about it, I started searching for information on child neglect.

I don’t know why this popped into my head, but I started looking at photos; I read stories. I internalized the heartbreak of dozens of families torn to pieces, the faith of humanity in smithereens. My heart broke a little more with every passing piece of information.

I watched my son sleep, and all I could think about was how incredible he is. When he woke up, I hugged him and kissed him until it was his next naptime. And when he stubbornly resisted sleep once again, I wasn’t upset; I was gentle, and he was soon lulled into peace.

I started wondering what kind of people do such awful things to their children. Several of the stories even contained parents who were honestly very upset when their children were taken from them, because they felt like they had loved their children the best that they could.

I decided to get a little deeper with it. How can neglectful parents and those who do not neglect their children exist in the same world? I decided that duality, while existing to create equilibrium, could possibly also exist to remind us of the things that are important. If everyone did everything the same way, our emotions would be useless. There would be no more interest, or passion, for life. We would forget how to be thankful, how to care; we would no longer be able to keep perspective on our lives.

I decided that we value our lives because we have put ourselves into them, heart and soul. We have made mistakes; we have taught lessons, and we have been taught. Our sad days make our happy days better, and that means that we have to be hurt sometimes (which includes being so overcome by heartache for children I have never met that I wanted to immediately go foster and love every single neglected child in the whole world).

I am not saying that I am glad that these children have suffered, by any means. Just that, if there is anything to be learned that can be positive from my research into the subject of child neglect, it is that we should spend as much time as we can loving, as much as we can. This is of special importance to our little sweeties, because they are learning from us how to interact with the world, and because they depend on us for many things, including security, and look up to us as their guides. To be treated as useless leaves a deep mark, and this is something that affects everyone when pain surfaces later on in life, or when it touches our hearts through the stories of others.

To anyone out there who does not feel loved, or who is being treated as useless: there is someone you have never met (me!) who thinks you are incredible, and that you have so much promise. That person wishes that they knew exactly where you were, because they would be giving you the biggest, warmest hug of your entire life. You are precious; you matter, and your pain matters.

I would like to observe silence in prayer for all of the victims of child neglect – those living, and those who suffered fatally.

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What are some ways that you can express more love in your life?  What have you done to remember to appreciate your sweeties, big and small?  Please leave a comment in the space below; our community is ours!

 

Encouraging Empowered Mamis Everywhere To Do What They Do

Mami

Mami is an artist, aspiring entrepreneur, and first-time, full-time mother. She enjoys long walks with Mr. Sweetie, good food and cooking, her family and dear friends, writing, arting and crafting. She doesn't know everything, but wants to learn, and loves to do research and share what she finds. She thinks life is like a box of puzzle pieces: you keep trying until it fits, because every piece has its place. She owns and operates whatever she sets her mind to, and knows that the sky is only the limit if you haven't left the ground yet.

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