Security Blankets and Lovies – Secret Confessions of a Grandmother


When doing research to write one of my recent blog posts, I ran across a reference suggesting to give your child a “lovey.” Since that is a nickname of mine, I had to check out what it was and was pleasantly surprised! Y’all may already know, but they can be those little blankets with some sort of stuffed animal head attached or simply a stuffed animal or a blankie. In a nutshell, they are a snuggly item (stuffed animal, blankie or the new-fangled hybrid of those two) that your Sweetie, toddler and beyond can have to comfort them.

One of the things I find repeatedly fascinating about re-visiting all the new mothering topics via Mami and Mr. Sweetie is that there is a complete universe of products, topics, and updates on how parenting is being done currently that I have been completely out of the loop on for years. It has many common threads to back when Mami was an infant/toddler/child, but is noticeably updated and easily available due to the internet. I frequently find myself wishing they had some of this stuff when I was a baby/child and when my kids were small … but back to the lovey.

This particular topic really caught my eye because I am STILL a very big fan of having a lovey. My mom told me that I had a blanket when I  was a very small baby that had a silk edge on it. I would fall asleep with the silky part in between my fingers, rubbing it back and forth. Over the years, it evolved from a small baby blanket to a blanket for my bed that had a silky soft trim, to a replacement blanket (bed-sized) when I was in my 20’s. This blanket remained with me until last year when I had to get rid of it due to health issues and I have been looking for a replacement ever since. (I saw one while traveling the other day that I will try to locate now that I am back home – no room left in the suitcase….)  There is just something about having a nice silky soft thing to hold on to and touch your face with (like a soft rose petal) that I find very soothing and relaxing. Guess it comes from way back when…

I also learned in  my research that lovies can be very helpful for mami’s during times of separation from their sweetie. This could be nap time, riding in their car seat, when their Sweetie is staying with someone while mami & daddy are out on a date, when their mami is gone shopping or doing some self-care (like exercising, getting a massage, haircut, pedicure, or being creative), etc. They can also be very calming for daycare situations or pre-school by providing something calming, comforting and familiar while they are away from their mami.

To aid in the effectiveness of the lovey, it is recommended for breastfeeding mamis to keep the lovey with them for several nights, snuggled up by them while sleeping, or tucked under their shirt while going about their day (you can also tuck it between your breasts). This allows for the lovey to absorb the precious eau de mami (scent of mami). If you are not breastfeeding, the lovey can be kept in bed with both parents for several nights – you could even do a combination of both (I just like the idea of dad’s scent being included).

The American Academy of Pediatrics supports the use of lovey’s in their article (you can read here) stating:

These special comforts are called transitional objects, because they help children make the emotional transition from dependence to independence. They work, in part, because they feel good: They’re soft, cuddly, and nice to touch. They’re also effective because of their familiarity. This so-called lovey has your child’s scent on it, and it reminds him of the comfort and security of his own room. It makes him feel that everything is going to be okay.

They also indicate that you are wise to have two identical lovies allowing for laundering, etc. It also allows for if one gets lost, which can be very traumatic for wee ones. Some parents and companies have gotten wise to this and actually sell lovies in a 3-pack. I really liked the organic lovies without toxic dyes, chemical flame retardants, and synthetic fabrics. You can get one for your Sweetie here.

Another handy suggestion is to name the lovey. The name may have something to do with what type of animal it is, the color it is, or the name your baby/toddler comes up with.

If you are more drawn to a blanket, these blankets and towels look very soft and snuggly and have high reviews. They are a bit pricier but would make a really nice cozy lovey (Little Giraffe). These Angel Dear lovey’s get you away from the benefits of organic but come in 2-packs (here).

If you don’t have a lovey yet for your Sweetie, you may want to consider getting one (or two or three…) to add to your parenting tool box and aid you in comforting your Sweetie, even when you are not around.

Blessings to you and thank you for all the loving parenting you do; it makes a better world, one Sweetie at a time.

Hug attached,

Koolma  : )


Does your Sweetie have a lovey, if so, what have you found works best for you?  Has a lovey saved the day for you?

We’d love to hear from you – please share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section so we can help each other, remember, we are all in this together!

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